Imagine this

A husband back to work after a wonderful holiday filled with peace, love, joy, eating, screaming, fighting(the 20lb. cat and the 10lb. poodle over a 4oz can of cat food) and did I mention eating?

Five wonderful children quietly playing with goodies from Santa(lets be honest all games came with headphones) and a peaceful mommy with a stack of new books.

Oh the thought of a long uninterrupted bubble bath in that huge wonderful bath tub.

Grab a book, the new Japanese Cherry Blossom bubble bath, a icy cold Dr.Pepper and of course the last piece of melt in your mouth fudge and I quietly sneak out of the room.

The sound of running water quickly alerts the ever vigilant toddler that momma is doing something that he is missing out on. A half full bath and chugging sounds send alarm bells ringing in mommas head that something is wrong, did pipes freeze, is the pump out, Oh H*ll

let it not be so, we are out of water.

So back into my super cool striped p.j.s add a hoody and my ultra chic black rubber pig farmer boots, and I was ready(did I forget to mention the truck froze in 4x4 low) grab my bright yellow hammer and slide under that Super Duty Power Stroke for a simple repair of banging on the transfer case to release the four wheel drive. Meanwhile I am such a hottie I have melted the snow and ice under me and have now encased myself in two feet of snow.

So I click my heels and chant theres no place like Hell, theres no place like Hell, and realize that I was softly beating on the transmission, oh well. A quick phone call later Mike says no damage don't worry he will fix all when he gets home.

So I'm off to see the neighbor the wonderful neighbor on Is-abella to beg water and show them my favorite webkinz game. oops.

Oh yeah Mikey is home the truck is fixed he hauls two loads of water fixes the toilet in the kid's bathroom(the cause of the fast drain) and I barbecued perfect chicken.

Today Mike took four kids to work with him and I, well I am off to the grocery store.

Oh how I long for that bath tub.

Seeing Santa

Dear Santa,
we have been very good kids this year. We have played nicely with each other not made a very big mess and have eaten all of our vegetables.

This year we are asking for electric scooters, the entire Star Wars movie collection, the rest of the "ology" books, a few new wii games, and lots and lots of snow,

the girls want learning laptops, new baby dolls and fairy books, and some new art supplies,

Dawson wants trucks, trucks and more trucks, a baby doll of his own and a nap in his own bed.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Our Manger is empty

For ten years I have been a mother.

And for eight of them we have decorated for Christmas.

And for eight of those eight years we have set out two nativity scenes;

One a full display of beautiful porcelain; Mary, Joseph, the baby Jesus, wise men, shepherds and flocks, and a heavenly host.

The other a wooden manger about eight inches long, lined with "raffia straw" in which a small babe lays wrapped in a simple burlap blanket.

Every year we hold our breath as the pieces are unwrapped from their protective layers and little hands shake with excitement as they softly set the Holy Family in place, but then comes the best part the excited squeals of "Baby Jeje".

It does not seem to matter that "last years baby" has no memory of this tradition, they always have the same awed and excited look as all the rest.

Throughout the rest of the evening of decorating, baking and candy making, little feet slowly wander as if by magic over just to check on "our baby". Straw is fluffed, a blanket smoothed and more than one sticky spot is found on a soft forehead as loving kisses are softly placed upon.

And last night just as in years past "our baby" went missing. He was there when prayers were said, he was there when all were tucked in, he was there when I went to bed(yes I check on him also) but when I went wandering just to check on little slumbering babes he was gone.

Now I will be honest I don't look to hard because I know he is safe and by morning he is always lovingly replaced. Besides I know as in years past he is snuggled close to other soft warm bodies, protected by them, as he so lovingly protects those precious spirits.

So my friends and family it is with love that I tell you; May you all know the peace and love of the season and may your mangers be empty.

Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

Just a quick letter to remind you that I have been a good girl this year. Okay, okay tried to be a good girl this year. I have kept my house mostly clean but with five little kids that is a great undertaking. I have attended church and payed my tithing regularly, alright most of the time. I have not chewed anyone out in the parking lot of Safeway or at the bus stop this year, I have also not made anyone cry just because I could. My bed has been made at least one day a week, and the dishes have been washed everyday. The laundry has been folded, not always put away, but always folded. The pets have been fed and petted, the children hugged, kissed, fed and lavished with attention. And my husband has been told just how much he is appreciated.

So Dear Santa in light of my efforts I have made a small list of things that I would like to receive this Christmas and in the upcoming year.

1. I want a new baby, yes I realize that I have received five already but I want another one. I also realize nothing will replace the one so recently lost, but please please please I want another one. Don't worry to much about the cost cause after five we pretty much have everything. And after all love is priceless.(I am pretty sure Saige and Nate would like one to.)

2. Just in case you really can't deliver on number one, then I would like my body back. You see I seem to have lost the one I used to have, and the one I found to replace it, is a little worn, bruised, battered, stretched and to be honest a little sore. While I would not trade the memories of the battles it has fought so far I would like a repair kit for it.

3. I would like to find a buyer for our house, yes I kinda understand the state of the economy, and realize that maybe the reason it has not sold is because we are needed here but really I don't want to be here any longer.

4. I am going to need a new friend, not to replace one, just maybe one that will not be 600 miles away. She needs to have at least a few kids and pets would be a plus. Like just going for a coke, making fun of husbands and understand Tuesday dump days, Wednesday water days and a lot of blond moments.

5. I would like the peace of mind that we as parents are doing the best that we can in raising our children, a little more patience, and a lot more time with them, as they are growing so fast.

6. I would like for them to know of our love for them always. For them to always sleep peacefully with the knowledge that they are safe and for them to know that we as parents will always strive to keep them safe.

So Santa I know that this is a really big list and I truly wish with all my heart for it all, but as a big girl I understand that I can't have it all and that's okay because you see I do understand the true meaning of Christmas.

I BELEIVE

Angel with attitude

Last night I made my yearly appearance at enrichment.

I signed up to bring soup and even picked up neighbor-friend Debbi so that we both had to go.
Turned out it was pretty good, Great meal, super good info on MONEY and some really good visiting.

On the way home though I quickly remembered why I seldom venture out after dark, as we were driving down Highway 64 a car traveling south quickly flashed its lights at us a few times.
Here in the middle of nowhere that does not mean cops, Oh no, that only means one thing Elk in the road. Sure enough 2 more miles and flashing hazard lights later we saw the thankfully completely dead cow in the middle of the north bound lane.

After muttering "oh shit" a few times I put on my hazard lights pulled safely to the shoulder and went to talk to the people standing on the side of the highway in the pitch black, and no kidding they were French tourists standing there with their cell phones taking pictures, and the killer thing, they didn't even know what of.

Soon finding out that they had not hit it I left them to Debbi and fast hauled my fat ass down to the car that had(I would rather face the unknown elk eliminator and possible damage than the tourists) and after all Debbi is much nicer than me!! Turned out he was okay and miraculously had clipped her with the drivers side and only had minor damage, and he had called D.P.S. already.

So back to the tourists, as they had not seen the hit or been involved we suggested that they continue on their way to see the Canyon and warned them that they should drive a little slower and also watch for more elk; after shooting looks of fear and confusion at us they thankfully left.

What to do, what to do, I had promised the poor guy that hit her that I would not leave until the cops got there, but I did have Debbi with me, four kids under 5, and 6 more at home waiting for us, so a few quick calls home sent those 6 to bed and Kallison and Caden worried in the back seat whispering little prayers.

I backed the fly boat farther down the embankment and turned my high beams on the body so that no other cars would hit her and sat, soon after that a really nice guy stopped to help and enquired why we did not move her to the shoulder, strangely I had already thought of that and felt that we should not get out of the damned car so I told him that I really didn't think we should, and so strangely enough he agreed with me and drove a little way down the road did a quick u-turn and put his high beams on her also.

Now the really weird or the really spiritual part you pick. No sooner had he put his lights on her than a royal a!@ came speeding down the highway and hit the dead elk with both drivers side tires and went angled airborne just like in the movies. And never stopped or even hit his breaks. The body of the poor elk was flipped into the air and now was in the south bound lane, and Debbi and I both in the car screaming Holy Sh#t at the top of our lungs.

Finally Officer Friendly showed, got the now messy elk out of the way thanked us and sent us home, probably wondering why we had not moved the elk out of the road ourselves, well this morning I discovered why, in the dark both Debbi and I thought we were closer to the shell station(the only lights out in our neck of the woods) and assumed we were on open flat ground
but in all actuality we were on the inside curve and up hill and would never have been seen by the before mentioned royal a!@ before he hit us and the other good Samaritan! So I have spent the rest of the morning in wonder over the message that we should not get out of the damn car and have decided that the Holy Ghost talks just like me how interesting.

So what do you all do after Enrichment?

What a life

Wow I haven't posted for over a week.

But what a week,
Carsten is on cast number four in just four weeks(that sounds so much better than 3 casts in two weeks) he has gone through 2 shades of blue, a lime green and now a black one, 1 was waterproof, 1 a quick fix, the last a traditional "please keep this dry" and now finally a new fangled waterproof one.
The medical assistant kindly refrained from laughing until we had walked away this morning, but did snort a little bit when she called out "see you in two weeks."
Our insurance company so hates us.

It's cold, it's warm, it's cold, it's warm, it snows, it's muddy, it snows, it's muddy.
Alright already its November let it SNOW.
Its 65 degrees here.

Debbi and I went to town(Flagstaff) last Monday, I bought a Turkey,
I hate turkey.
We also saw a mans weenie mobile(Oscar Mayers), he gave us little weenie whistles, on the way home we saw a guy peeing on a fence post,
two weenies in one day and only one whistle.

Mike has been gone, and then home, and then gone and then home, right now he is gone,
Thank Heavens I get my own bed for a whole week.
I love that man.

I just left Safeway and spent two hundred dollars there and I am still out of Tide and sour cream.
I just need a dollop of Daisy.

Mike cut all of Dawson's sweet baby curls off Saturday and I did not cry,
well not very much.

Ardynn and her friend Shaylee spent Saturday playing on the swing set,
Shaylee will now be having surgery on her left elbow, broke that little knobby thing clean off.

I have ran out of storage space for all of our food storage, I am thinking up ways to incorporate it into furniture, any ideas?
After all I do need a new kitchen table.

I learned that Coke has nutmeg in it, therefore as it contains a healthy herb it must be good for you.

And if one more person says "we would like to buy your house, can you carry the loan" I will hurt them.
I guess I could break their arms.

So other than that, not much is going on, how was your week?

Today in History

Does anyone know what today is?

Friday November 7, 2008.

Yup that means that sixty seven, yes I said 67 years ago My Grandparents tied the knot.

See they met in California, at the start of World War II, apparently dear old grandma was quite the flirt dating and having lots of fun with lots of friends, when she met the handsome Dan and fell hard(had nothing to do with the convertible).

Well they were engaged in the spring of 1942 and married November 7, and the 9, of 1942, hmm... someone forgot to pick up the marriage license before the wedding so they had a two day affair!!!!

And now one World War, several business ventures, 4 kids, 20 grandchildren, and 39 great grand children(sorry if I missed any). I would call 67 great years a stunning success.

Congratulations, Evo Morales. oops I mean President Obama

Spooooooky Oooookies

Sorry we are a little late with the boo pictures but we had the whole week off from school and work. Boy did they have fun. As you can see Dawson went as the "Cowboy that wouldn't"

Kallison was my gorgeous "Pink-o-lisious" Flower Fairy

Ardynn was very pretty in purple flower power

Carsten is my favorite as he chose to be a tree again this year, of course it was with a broken limb.(three casts in two weeks).

My number one Army medic complete with his Thompson that his Daddy made. So as you can see Halloween was a complete success.

Boo baby blow out bash

For two pregnancies I begged the Dr. not to let me have a "boo baby", so what did Brooke go and do? HAPPY BIRTHDAY TYLER!! Or should I say Happy Birthday Storm Trooper.
No that's not Barry B. Benson its cooper.

The Birthday was super fun we played games, ate mummy dogs, and wrapped our own "mummies". Thanks Brooke for the great time and super hot trick or treating weather.

Thank you, Grandma

Dear Grandma Simper,

Yesterday I made rolls, last week I made rolls and a few weeks ago I made rolls and cinnamon rolls three days in a row. Yes we, they love them that much. I do not double the recipe I quadruple it. We use them for sandwiches, snacks, and soup dresser uppers.

I recently discovered that my wonderful children are using them as currency at school, their teachers love them and now I will be making them for the schools Thanksgiving feast. So 60 students and 12 teachers, aids, and me and the little ones will be celebrating turkey day with a little bit of you.

Did you know that you were right, if you make them when you are stressed, mad or just a little upset. Your dough kneads out very smooth and your rolls are very light. Why though did you always put your raisins in the dough instead of sprinkling them in with the cinnamon and sugar?

I will be truthful though I very seldom add those pesky raisins(and when I do I use very pretty golden ones) more than likely our cinnamon rolls have chocolate chips in, or sometimes toffee chips or bits of caramel for that added stickiness I mean sweetness. And lots of cream cheese icing.

Every summer the South Rim Helibase hosts H.T.A. (helitack training academy). They have crews of three or four firefighters, e.m.t.s, and rangers from around the country that that transfer in and out every two weeks. And most of them or the really goods ones anyway are treated to your cinnamon rolls after completion of Mikes lecture I mean lesson on how not to get killed by your helicopter. Trust me they all strive to be the really good ones.

During the winter when the crew has a busy week or just a stressful one i.e. body recoveries, they request them just to snack on with there coffee, or cocoa, and for me that brings back a little of the elk hunt memories of my childhood. Which in my weird stressful life I need. Those memories often times keep my other family memories from splintering, like my family.

So now I am off to finish Halloween costumes, pack for our little trip, and wipe little runny noses, so please know that a few recipies are safe and still used.(never shared I need a few selfish memories).

For the love of a boy

Our dearest Carsten, eight years ago at 1:37 p.m. you made your way into this world, quietly, and surprisingly calm. If we had only known.





HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARLIE BEAR. Known to all as Carsten Morgan Brinkworth, you have made our lives so wonderful, rich and full. You with your bright smile, infectious giggle, and modest manner. How wonderful it was to have finally met heaven. You have a manner born of greatness, your soft spoken ways have brought you many blessings, just as we have been given you. I may never know why I was blessed with you as a son, but am ever grateful.


1; Carsten is loved as Charlie bear, Bear cub, Cubbie bear, and simply Char.


2; The day Carsten was born the power went out for 3 days.


3; Carsten has an amazing ability with animals, he can calm the most nervous of creatures.


4; Carsten is brilliant, but will never bring attention to himself.


5; Our funny Charlie was born growling, and rolling his eyes.


6; Carstens best friend is Runner Bunner, she is a most amzing tabby, who will ride his bike with him, and sleep on her back just like her boy.


7; Carsten would like to be a veterinarian or a pilot when he gets older.(I hope he never grows up).


8; Carsten is a great brother(I was just told that by his older brother).


Happy Birthday my little man.

The one who started it all

Ten years ago today at 2:47 p.m. this baby boy turned this ordinary girl into a mommy.

Congratulations Braxton Michael Brinkworth today you are ten. I hope that you know how wonderful and amazing you are. You are such a great example to your younger brothers and sisters, and your mom and dad are so proud of you. Your strength and knowledge amaze me, who else would dress up as a ghost bat for Halloween at the age of six, (there really is such a bat). You have such a strong testimony of the Gospel, and your compassion and humility humbles me I am so proud to call you mine, and am in awe with wonder that our Heavenly Father has allowed me to be your mom.

1; Braxton is also called; Bug, B-boo, BB, and bug-a-boo.

2; Braxton has been a straight A student his entire school career.

3; Bug was recently named a Student of the month for September.

4; Braxtons best friend is named Green Bean, he is very soft and furry, and purrs only for Bug.(I promised not to tell you about his baby doll Ramie, he has had her since he was 18 months old, she is every bodies favorite doll).

5; Our Bug enjoys camping, hunting, drawing and reading, and is a great shot.

6; Braxton has a near perfect memory.

7; Bug wins practically every contest he has ever entered, including, a trip to the circus, a mountain bike, and a new quilt made be his teachers.

8; Braxton is a hero to all his brothers and sisters. Dawson yells B.B. and does the happy dance whenever he sees him.

9; Bug is a very compassionate person and is always the first to reach out to others.

10;He wants to be a pilot, or work with the Game and Fish when he grows up.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRAXTON WE LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of bears and bones

Our weekend in review:

Friday; Carsten called sobbing from school to tell me that he had fallen at lunch recess and had hurt his hand, and please come and get him.

Wonder pets, wonder pets were on our way, to save a little bear and save the day.

I rushed to the fly boat(mini van) leaving a great nap, and good book home with Mike, and rushed to the school, and Safeway, and the pharmacy, and the beauty supply store, and the shell station for a coke. Yeah his arm hurt that bad.

Saturday; Mikes danmed alarm went off at 5a.m. so He, Braxton and Ardynn left the rest of us home(remember Carstens arm hurt) to go bear hunting. So while I played on the computer, Carsten, Kallison and Dawson played wii.(yep the arm still hurt).

Ring ring, hello, wonder pets wonder pets were on our way, can't save the bear or the rest of the day.

"Hey honey I got a bear, one shot with my pistol at 40 yards," "WELL SHIT" I mean that's great dear, see you when you get home, how are my kids doing?" "Umm kids oh yeah their great, don't you want to come see my bear?"

To the fly boat!

did I mention I was still in my p.j.s? "Nice bear babe" "Oh hi Bishop". "Can I go home now?", "to the fly boat wonder pets" "whatever stay with you dad, I don't care."

Sunday; "Yes we are going to church, as soon as I get Grizzly Adams out of bed, go eat breakfast" "Carsten take some Motrin if it still hurts, and quit running around swinging your arm!"
Wow we got there with time to spare, "now get a drink and go to the bathroom cause you will NOT be getting up after the opening prayer!" "Braxton give me that book I don't care if it is about a Mormon boy!" "give me that pistol, this is not show and tell, its Sacrament meeting".

Now I know why we Mormons don't drink, I would be in rehab already!!!

"Alright already Carsten, I remember saying that if it bruised we would go to the Dr's. lets go to the clinic."

To the fly boat!

"Oh, hi Dr. Motter, yes Ardynns leg is looking much better, no she still won't ride on the scooter, oh and yes Kallisons sinus infection is almost gone. By the way this is Carsten, he hurt his hand at school Friday.
X-rays sure we love pictures, WHAT it is BROKEN, crap I'm sorry Charlie Bear. Okay a splint today, see the orthopedic in the morning, can you Super Size that codeine prescription?"
"No we only have five kids, yes I will be sure to introduce you the other two. Yes we ought to have a exam room dedicated to us, and an isle at Safeway, Ha Ha."

So now my poor little bear has a broken paw, all casted hard in blue, and Mikes poor little bear is at the taxidermists. And I suck as a wonder pet.

To the fly boat wonder pets, mom needs a coke!

Alas' poor Duckie, I knew him well

So sad, the truth has finally been reveled our poor little curious kitty Duckie met with a fowl end. He met up with the neighbors two pit bulls(I say neighbors but that's two blocks down), early last winter and it has been kept from us all this time.

I don't know if I should be upset that they lied to me when I asked them about him or relieved that I don't have to tell the kids that Duckie is dead yet again, cause you see Duckie definitely used his "9" lives.

It all started in May of 2006 we were being overran with kittens. It seemed that every stray that wandered in was with kitten, and Mike was HOT, so after letting everyone here in ranching country know that due to budget and land size we were going into cat farming all extra cats and kittens quickly found new homes. Well all except Duckie, you see Kallison and I had fallen in love with that little "short bus" kitty, not that Duckie was stupid or anything he would come when called but he never could figure out who called him.

Oh, our little furry friend was great he played in the pool with the kids, burped when hugged just a little to tight and head bumped with reckless abandon, he also never met an open door he didn't like(sorry schwan's man, and ups dude, and poor neighbor Debbi who woke up with him on more than one occasion). Every family should have a cat like him.

Well come June of 07' I feared that Duckie was dead he hadn't come in one morning and no amount of "kitty, kitty, kitty" could cokes him home, and tragically on my way to the gas station I spied a furry, really furry black and white body on the side if the highway, after stopping I really felt that it was Duckie and called Mike crying that our Duckie was dead. I am sure that Mike never once did that excited Toyota jump upon learning that his enemy, err cute little kitty was road smear, and promised to bury him after work.

I composed myself and went into tell our poor heart broken children that Duckie was dead. I over estimate the sorrow "can we see him?, is his head smashed?, so when is he coming home? what!!!!

Oh S@&T, Braxton had baseball practice, how do I hide that sad furry body from them on the way into town and back, "Hey kids look at that cow, tree, illegal alien, fish, whatever" "Mom where is Duckie?" "GET OVER IT, there is no way in hell I am going to let you gawk at our poor dead cat".

As I pulled into the driveway my cell phone rang, and as luck would have it just as Mike was letting me know in no uncertain terms that there was NO WAY IN H@LL THAT THIS DEAD SMELLY CAT IS YOUR DARLING PAIN IN THE $SS DUCKIE, Duckie came over crying to me that he had in fact been locked in the neighbors house all day.

So while the rest of us morn just a little for a cat that we had convinced ourselves had found a new home Mike is rejoicing.

Donkeys and Elephants

Many years ago, I registered as a donkey, well after getting married and becoming a mother I became a elephant, and now after realizing that I am not ready for floral print dresses and my own book bag for church I have registered as an independent.

Now before many of you get offended, I understand your need for floral print(just kidding). I just want to vote my conscience not my party. And while my parties have changed one thing hasn't I am still a mommy and I want what is best, not only for my children but also for everyone elses, even the ones I don't like.

Now maybe what I want isn't the most politically correct stance it is my honest stance, so here goes,

1. We Do Not need socialized health care (just look at Canada there is no leval one trama centers in the entire country), we need affordable health care. I have seen some pretty hefty medical bills in the last 18 months(480,000.00+) and while we did not have to pay all, only about 30,000.00(really) it hurt our little family. So dear government STOP paying medical bills for all the illegals and start using the savings on legal Americans no matter their color.

2. Admit you can do very little about the economy, and stop talking to us like we are stupid. I don't live on Wall St. or Main St.(its barely even a street) but I do know that the House and Legislature control your checkbook.

3. Help us educate our children in English. History has shown over and over again a divided country falls and it will fall fast. It is a wonderful thing to preserve your history and culture after all it is what has made America great, but please embrace and celebrate the culture we already have here.

While there are many more, I'll stop my rants here.

But friends and family it really comes down to this on just which way you vote, follow your heart, and after much research, I will follow My beliefs on Babies, Guns, and God.

Thursdays Thoughts

Okay so I am a little anal, some of you subscribe to People, or Better Homes and Gardens, not me, I get Time and Newsweek, yes this stay at home mom is a world news junkie. I know whose governments are toppling, who is fighting who(I am a silent supporter of Palestine), and just where my dollars(we are currently gaining against the Euro) stack up in the global economy. My kids are on a first name basis with all of CNN(don't worry they don't see or hear to much cause can you say flu pandemic?).

So you can imagine my panic when Albertsons suddenly put a limit on power buys I mean really how can one buy 40 cans of black olives if the limit is ten(I made 4 trips in a half hour). In my paranoid mind that screams food shortage and today it was confirmed, okay its in Ethiopia and they always have shortages, but also that's usually where famine and descent have historically started and with our weakened dollar(down .40 since 2002) and dependence on credit, it really does make me nervous. I know trust in the Lord, and prepare but it still worries a girl.

My latest canning order is huge but it usually is(trust me I KNOW how to grind wheat), I am pre buying winter propane, and our savings account has never looked better, but with five kids I still wake up in a cold sweat thinking about Christmas. I worry most about some of our neighbors and friends, who either live with the grasshopper mentality or in our economically challenged region never seem to have enough? Will I see my friends have to tell their children that there is not enough food, and how do you know when you have spread your "oil" to thin? Is my "ant" life style to smug or are we just striving to do whats right?

And now the Feds want us to part with close to 900 billion dollars, say what, how is that going to help? Better yet who is it going to help, not me I can already tell as I don't work on Wall Street or thankfully other than Mikes 401k no longer own stock.

Some days I feel like maybe I should reread "The Grapes of Wrath", buy my kids overalls and just stay home and watch "The Walton's" reruns while eating black olives I just don't know, but one thing I do know is I really can't wait for General Conference.

who flung dung?

As most of you know Mike is a helicopter pilot at The Grand Canyon, and while it may sound pretty glamorous with all that firefighting and really cool air rescues it can also be very boring. Some days like today he is just waiting, playing video games, taking a nap and reading a book, now tomorrow he will fly the water flight and the Qwest guys around checking phone lines but last week was my favorite flight. Removing all the poop from the canyon outhouses, yes we all make fun of it cause its a really "crappy" job "slinging shit"all day, after all he flies like "crap" and at the end of the day you are "pooped out".

So with this in mind please proceed;

Back when we(me, siblings, and cousins) were young and cute, my Mother and Aunt Val would on occasion venture out with all seven of us cousins and blow big bucks(really I have no idea) on Chinese food at Lee's in P.G. pretty good food back then I mean it wasn't China Light after all.

And as you may know when you get that many little shits together something will happen.

Oh nothing to bad just a few pranks, and some really bad Chinese accents asking the wait staff stupid questions like whoflungdung, and some that I really can't print. But Andy's favorite was always whoflungdung. So just for him I have finally discovered who flung dung.

It was MIKE!

Really it was. Just last week actually, from 25 feet in the air going roughly 20 m.p.h. he "pickled" a 1200 pound load of human waste, and and left a dung mark of about 50 feet in diameter out at the waste treatment plant at the "Canyon".

So Andy, after 18 years I have finally answered your question, so now go forth and torment those at Panda Express(do you reallly think there's panda in there?). And don't forget in between the sheets.

things I have learned this week

Just a few random things I learned this week,
1; my four year old watches way to much t.v. last night as I served dinner on paper plates(again) she happily announced "It's a Dixie day".
2; when threatening to wistol pip your husband with someones play pistol stand back, fluid though the nose is never good.
3;there is something worse than a guy in Capri's, a guy in Capri's also wearing shoes and socks(SEXY).
4; never let the toddler sweep the floor, new dishes are pricey.

Why you should ALWAYS wear a slip

Okay Niki this one is for you( and by the way I had to spend $10 on my own crackpot cookbook)

Bout a year ago maybe a little longer we as a family of 7 crazy people made it to church, no crutches no canes, and a healthy baby. Everyone was dressed so cute, the girls in matching dresses, the big boys in slacks and ties, even Mike was back in "real"clothes did I say everyone okay well not the mama, as I recall I was just in a black T, and a denim wrap around skirt and as I was rushed that morning did not have time to slip on a slip, but who cared I was wearing denim(try seeing through that) Oh yeah and a pair of really cute black leather slides.

Joy upon Joy we even arrived at church early and got OUR bench(you know that short one in the back with wheelchair spots on each side that's the Brinkworths bench). Oh, no here comes Brother Johnson, ah what the opening and closing prayer oh well sure, thanks to crying baby, Mike ended up giving the opening and I the closing but wait I didn't have to after all. It seems that as I was hurriedly getting dressed I did not completely knot the tie on my skirt, and Carsten who spent most of Sacrament snuggled up to my left side had set on the ties so as I stood up to go deliver a great prayer(I had all hour to work it out in my head) I noticed something brushing my foot Yup you guessed it my little bear cub had pulled the tie and my skirt fell open for the entire bishopric to get a great glance at my "G"s.

Quickly oh so very quickly I threw myself down into a empty spot on a bench and quickly whispered to the GREAT Brother Randall that my skirt had fallen off and would he please please give the closing prayer, what a great guy he sprinted up there and prayed for a full six minutes while I got myself in order. You know the funny thing is only about ten people even knew what had happened until the MORON Brother Grimes made fun of me for chickening out, and a few of us laughed so hard we ended up telling him about my "wardrobe malfunction" and shortly after everyone knew.

And no that is not my most embarrassing moment I am pretty sure that hasn't even happened yet.

I Did Not!!!!!!

Yesterday I did not,

I did not let the kids watch tv so that I could sleep just a little longer,

I did not feed them day old muffins so that my kitchen stayed clean,

I also did not let Ardynn wear a play shirt to church, after she could not find her "cute" black T.

And I really did not take them to Safeway to wander around eating free cookies before church; cause if we had stayed home any longer their home environment would not have been safe.

I did not almost take Dawson to nursery,

And I most certainly did not eat(share his goldfish) instead of going to Sunday School(I had already been to Safeway).

And no I did not take them to McDonald's for lunch(I am so bad.)

I promise I did not let that cute little toddler fall asleep in a pile of pillows and blankets while the rest played wii and I read this weeks Time magazine.

I did not think bad words when I dropped paint on my last pair of unpainted pants(ebay here I come).

I did not really let my nine year old shoot ravens out of the tree in the back yard off of the back porch.(great shot Braxton).

Really I did not rest my head on a freshly painted wall as I struggled to paint behind the toilet.

I did not question Mikes need for 407 time.

I did not put Kallison in Ardynns shower so that she could wash her little sisters hair
.
I really did not forget to take the tortillas out of the freezer for chicken enchiladas, we had chicken enchilada bake instead(kinda layered like lasagna).

I did not pour Dawson a glass of ginger ale while Carsten said the dinner prayer just to keep him quiet.

I also did not sneak Braxtons cat into sleep with him just because he was feeling a little lonely.

And I REALLY DID NOT tuck them in their warm safe beds with extra hugs and whispered stories while I thanked my Heavenly Father for each of them.

So what have you not done lately?

How we met (or who paid who and who is still paying)

Okay, okay I can take a hint. Tell the story, well here it goes.

For you that remember some years ago Chet(my little brother) became interested in honey bees, and after some concern and weird looks the fam started looking into them. Well word got out and a few well meaning ward members kept mentioning the Brinkworths who at that time were well into their 50's(remember that cause it will be important.) So out goes the Parents and Chet to do some "Bee talking."

Unfortunately, they the Brinkworths' still had an unclaimed son( a little shy, a little weird looking, and at that moment under a car so a little dirty). Well the "men" started talking bees, and the women started talking hopeless offspring. One thing led to another and one mother(mine) whipped out a picture of said child and then proceeded to shove said picture at poor dirty guy and proclaim "this is our oldest daughter you should meet her." and then they left.

That next Sunday I went to church and as I was still new in the ward did not think it too weird when introduced to the older couple known as Dick and Val. They seemed nice and they had just given Chet "bee boxes" so I was even nice and said nothing about the loud cowboy boots clomping as they sneaked late into Sacrament meeting( I now know that that is Dicks way of letting them all know that he made it another week) said hello and proceeded to Nursery.

Well, well, well, stupid me a few days later I was at work minding my own business and spending as much as I made, when the phone rang " Hello Casual Corner this is Dusty, how may I help you?" "Oh hey Dust this is your mom what time do you get off?" "about four why?" "Well Valerie Brinkworth called and invited you to their house for dinner tonight and I told her you would be there at about six." "Ahh, what the Hell, dinner with the old people, what are you talking about and why?" "Well they really liked you Sunday and thought you would like to come out, she raises Collies and I mentioned you really liked animals." "Uhm well okay." So being the smart person that I am it finally dawned on me that something more was going on(after all it had only been a few short years before that, that my darling Grandmother had mailed off a Valentine card to a complete stranger from me). So I went home and changed into a pair of old pants of Saiges(yes five kids ago we could share them) a t-shirt and an old sweatshirt that I think was Brooke's.

Well I was off to have dinner with the old folks and after a few missed roads, and a very interesting side trip to the middle of nowhere, I arrived to be met by four or five hairy collies, Mike, his brother Tom, and his fiance Christina who were out shooting pictures of her old boyfriends(how weird are these people). Well after pretending not to know how to shoot and the showing off a little it was time for dinner; fish, steam cooked potatoes with only butter, salt and pepper? and salad with chick peas(what). Nothing better than a strained dinner with people you don't know and food you don't like, and a guy you have so obviously been set up with who doesn't talk.

After a few uncomfortable hours okay 20 minutes or so it came out Mike was a helicopter pilot and had just applied for a job in Alaska, reallllly not such a loser after all, so smarty me said "well just date me I seem to be the good luck job charm(last two guys I dated got jobs in D.C. and Argentina). "Haa Haa." "Would you like to meet the horses? We have one named Dusty but we call him dust ball" uhm was that supposed to be funny? So off to meet the ornery assed horse who proceeded to bite my shoe and grab the sleeve of my shirt, Wow nice to meet you I am out of here.

That very next day okay 2 days later Mike called "would you like to go to the dance that the single ward is having?" (really you are kidding me people really go to those things) "well okay", so off to Denver we went, did I forget to mention that I don't dance? oh well I looked really good flat on the floor. An ice cream cone later both me and my two left feet were back home safe and sound.

Coincidentally just a few days later Mike was on his way to Alaska, am I good or am I good? Well the night he got there he called me was I ever surprised, not that he had called but that I missed him(hmmm something was up). Well we phoned every night and wrote or sent cards at least 3-4 times a week(I still have every letter and card, so does he.) And in July I went to Juneau for a week(it rains an awful lot up there) to visit. Well we did talk the bid "L" word a little and even the "M" word.

October finally rolled around and Mike was coming home(boy was I glad the phone bill was way up there), well I picked him up at the airport and then he left to go Elk hunting that same day with his brothers and dad, so he was gone for another week. The night they got home his mother again invited me out for dinner and a chance to meet the family.(Yes he got his elk) and that night I got my diamond. And two in a half months later(January 9, 1998) we were married in the Denver Colorado Temple.
And now ten years and five kids later we have yet to go on a "REAL DATE" but we are loving it!

DRUM ROLL PLEASE..............

Okay everyone I need some help because according to my bank account I am broke(ok not really but I can see how it could happen). So I am reducing myself, okay okay just nicely asking everyone for $2o.oo just kidding. Really I am just looking for some new recipes for soups, casseroles or anything I can cook in my handy dandy crock pot. So if you all have some great recipes please post them in my comments for all to see, or email them to me, and please no turkey recipes.

p.s. if you post some I will tell you about my skirt, no dating, and my thoughts on Sarah Palin.

only in my life

Time; the present, usually on Wednesdays our local Jehovah's Witnesses have their little weekly get togethers, and on some Wednesdays but not all they come a'knocking. Now all of us locals understand, cause at least in our neck of the woods we are all Mormon(not to mention the only ones at home in the morning), so if they get by the dog, the DOG, and the waving flag, we let them stand and chat on the porch with us.

Time; roughly 2 years ago, I was doing a little shopping on the net, comparing prices and just trying to save a few bucks, so I had the great idea to buy a new bra after all I know my size and if you don't have to take small children bra shopping it is a good day.

Wow, did you know that you can get any size and really any color on the net. Well after some looking and some giggling and yes, one phone call I settled on a few new ones, now for years I have been wearing your basic white super duper bras or the extra super duty nursing bras so I went a little wild, I ordered a taupe, pale mint and getting a little frisky I even ordered a lavender one.

Okay fast forward about a week and in the mail I received a medium sized envelope with no outside markings, right then I knew what that was so rushing into the house I opened Pandora's box, so one boring taupe, a very pretty pale mint no seem under wire, and get this a HOOKER PURPLE NUMBER WITH LACE!!! Check order form, yep lavender, check web description, again lavender, oh well I could wear it under black, or other dark shirts and after all I was feeling a little frisky. I kept it.

Time; the present, Talk talk talk, yes I am still Mormon, yes I still believe in Hell(after all I still live here!) and no I am not interested in "Oh, what, the small boy child wants out of the house, yes he is so cute and busy hah hah, and yes I really have my hands full hah hah", and no kidding here comes cute busy little boy out of the house wearing a HOOKER PURPLE backpack. Well after a few smirks, a little chuckle and a few Watchtowers QUICKLY shoved at me they left, and I giggled and thanked small boy child.

Time; any Wednesday after this, "should we stop here?" "no I think not, didn't we tell you about that woman?" me, I now love hooker purple.

So Mikes a cradle robber or (Happy Birthday to the Crazy Lady with ALL the kids and cats)

Well Mike has informed me that all is fair in love and war, what ever that means but I guess fair is fair. So here are 34, yes, only 34 things about me. I had to do the math 2008-1974=34; I know crazy but for some reason birthdays do not really bother me, after all I have earned every one of them.


1; I love winter and look forward to snow all year.

2;I know I need to loose 20 or so pounds but just don't really care(after all the rest of me now matches my boobs).

3;Hi my name is Dusty and I am an Ebay addict.(do they have a 12 step for that?)

4;I self medicate with chocolate and beads.

5;I cannot read just one book at a time, I must have at least 3 around the house open to different spots.(I also read the last chapter first).

6;I AM SCARED, of what I really don't know but some times there is just this bit of fear.

7;I love, adore, worship, my five kids and would have a least one more, but must wait until we get a bigger house and much bigger pay check.

8;I hate to clean my house, I love the feel of a clean house, but absolutely hate cleaning it.

9;I refuse to eat: eggs, fish, most dairy products, pancakes, raw broccoli, most pork products, tomatoes, Jello, and Thanksgiving turkey!

10;I am neurotic about food storage, and LOVE my wheat grinder( don't worry Grandpa I promise to never make green pea biscuits).

11;I NEVER dated my husband we just sort of got married.

12;I HATE the town of Williams, I have never met such a group of people that were so bitter and distrustful of each other.

13;I really don't like other peoples kids(family not included).

14;I open all my Christmas presents early and re wrap them just so I have no surprises.

15;When I get nervous or scared I start spelling random words in my head, and I am an awful speller.

16;I have always felt like the "Ugly Duckling".

17;I have always wanted to rebel but just don't quit know what to do.

18;I hate and I mean absolutely hate odd numbers(see #7).

19;I still feel guilty about keeping the 20 dollars I found in the parking lot of Target 2 years ago.

20;Yes my skirt really did fall off in Sacrament meeting(I was on my way up to say the closing prayer), the good news they have never asked me to say another prayer.

21;While we are on embarrassing moments, I have also super glued my mouth shut.

22;I am deathly afraid of snakes, spiders not so much.

23;I am actually considering applying to the police academy when Dawson gets older.

24;While shooting a stray cat that had caused a lot of problems I also "killed" the trampoline.

25;I am a sucker for anything small and furry, I just fought one of our cats for a baby jack rabbit.
(no we did not keep it, Brinkworth rule#3 No pets that other pets consider food.)

26;I do not have church calling right now, how lucky can a girl get.

27;Discovered that while juicing your own fruit and veggies is good, watermelon juice sucks.

28;I have let my wonderful kids eat ice cream for breakfast on several occasions, it is a dairy group after all.

29;I wish the goldfish would Die!

30;One of my great fears is that the "phone will ring" or pilots on my front porch with that look on their faces.

31;The above line regarding my children.

32;I am scared that our house will not sell and I cannot see us being happy here much longer.

33;I know that I have a wonderful husband, but sometimes I still treat him like crap.

34;I do not answer to the name "Betty".(see previous post).



Okay I know that I am posting this a couple of days early, but I am off to party, not really Mike is coming home today after being gone for 2 weeks so we are just going to have some family time without the computer. So HAPPY BIRTHDAY to ME.

So I married an old man(or Happy Birthday to my Drag Queen helicopter pilot)

Today Mike is 40!!!!! So Happy Birthday Harold!!

Can you believe that you are really this old, or are you surprised that you made it this far?

After all you have survived your mother dressing you up like a girl, being raised with 5 brothers, a couple of "Hard" helicopter landings, a car crash, raising 5 wonderful kids, and being married to ME!!!

Really Mike is a great guy, so to follow every ones example here are 40, yes count them 40 things you may or may not know about Mike.

1: He was supposed to be named John, thankfully that didn't happen he is Michael John Brinkworth(his younger brother is John).

2: He fell in love with flying at the age of 3.

3: Mike is great at all he tries(it really pisses me off and I have actually looked for things that may kick his a**)

4: He is a wonderful father; he has taken our children turkey hunting so I could go to enrichment, and taken the older 4 trick or treating by himself so that I could rest(yes I was preggers).

5:Mike earned his Eagle Scout award at the age of 13.

6:He claims that he was never going to marry or have children(good luck on that).

7:He got his pilots license at the age of 17.

8:He has worked(flown helicopters) in 12 states and 2 countries(China this fall).

9:Mike finished helicopter school in only 2 1/2 months instead of 6.(see #3).

10:For some weird reason Mike claims that while Coke is "bad" for you Mt. Dew is okay?

11:Yes it is true we never dated(arranged marriage).

12:Mike loves to hunt but really hates fishing but will go with me and the kids because I don't like to touch or clean the fishies.

13:Mike served his mission in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada. He went 6 months late due to a dirt bike accident.

14:Mike is current to fly anything that flies except a float plane and he really wants to do this.

15:Mike is afraid of nothing except debt.(that we still have a house payment chaps his payed for hide).

16:He claims to be allergic to cats(we have four and one is asleep on/in our bed right now).

17:He did not get to "name" any of our children.

18:while he is very quiet, he is the first one his brothers call for help.

19:He has a very very strong testimony of the church, and a great respect for his priesthood.

20:On that note it takes him longer to get ready for church than me and five kids.

21:He has a very strong pain threshold that came in very handy last year.

22:He let me hold Dawson first, and I will never forget that, Thanks Harold.

23:He claims to love me.

24:Mike loves to play the piano and is quite good.

25:He likes to listen to Air Supply, Journey, and John Denver(man you are really old). *Brooke told me not to forget to mention C.W. McCall, you know "Convoy".

26:We call him "Safety Sam" but he is the only one to have been seriously injured.

27:Mike actually owns more shoes, pants, shirts etc. than me but claims I never stop shopping.

28:While I was in the hospital, Mike got 3 kids ready for school(hair combed even), Kallison to the sitter and then went to physical therapy and only then realized he had forgotten his own shirt.(again a super dad) Can you say thank goodness for cotton garment tops?

29:Mike is a GREAT pilot and has a loyal following that will only fly with him(sorry AZGF we really do want to move).

30:Growing up a favorite game to play was bottle rocket tag(but they wore helmets). preferably in the dark while it was raining.

31:Mike had an imaginary friend named Jimmy Figment(he didn't catch on to the last name for years).

32:He had never eaten a B.L.T. until we married, nor had he B.B.Q.d

33:He loves to ride his dirt bike and go 4 wheel driving, I think it is boring so he often goes alone, ditto on looking for animals, and just going for a ride(no ice cream no drive).

34:He is great at putting up with me and all of our strays(I promise I did not know that cat was pregnant).

35:He has mopped the floors though all of my five pregnancies and will still do it now for a *reward*(explains four of five pregnancies).

36:willingly takes me, all the kids, the dog, and Brooke and Brads family camping every year. Sets us up and cleans us up and still says its fun. Usually in the rain.

37:Enjoys going(flying) on the road but likes coming home better.

38:Has my respect and love.

39:Mike is a very patient father and his children adore him.(they all have done the daddy dance at one time or another)

40:Actually answers to Harold and Binky.



Wow I actually came up with 40, and can't wait to come up with 40 more. So Happy Birthday Mike(Harold) we look forward to you coming home Saturday. And yes Dear I realize that my Birthday is Monday so what are you going to do about it, you will always be older than me.

Much Love Betty.(his wife, mother to his children, pain in his ass, love of his life cause after all I love you so much; but just so much).

the first day of school

Well here is the not so great picture of the first day of school, Braxton is in the 4th grade but in a 4th, 5th split with only 12 students, and Carsten in second, his class is also a split 2nd and 3rd he has only 10 kids in his class, Ardynn is in the first grade with a class of 14 so they have a teacher all to themselves. So far they are really enjoying the charter school and are having a great time meeting new friends. By the way aren't the uniforms cute.
p.s. blogger is acting up so no pictures will post them later.

twas the day before school

Twas the day before school, and all through our home,
the children were mourning, for no more could they roam,
no more lizards to catch, no more naps must they take,
just please mommy please, cookies please bake,

The uniforms are ironed, missing shoe order found,
the only sad part our Daddy's not around,
our teachers we've met, supplies have been bought,
hair has been cut, and new backpacks we've got,

Mommy says "a new school is a must, cause
with five of you kids its scholarships or bust."
smaller classes, more focus on reading and math,
for us a much stronger educational path.

Tomorrow will bring early rising back,
and mommy will have three lunches to pack,
the alarm the last battle of summer to fight,
so to us a good school year,and to y'all a good night.

is it time for school yet?

On the way to church last week, Mike and I were talking about work(his not mine I refuse to do anything) the house, the kids, our weird dog when I hear this; Carsten: "Mom", "mom", "mom", "mom", "Mooooooom"!!!!!!!!!, Me:"Carsten" Carsten "What?"

16 more days of summer.

For Sale

HOUSE FOR SALE
Enjoy natures beauty from the comfort of your porch.
1920sq. feet, immaculate four bedroom, two full bath including master suite with garden tub. Stunning two way fireplace, living room, family room, and formal dining/music room. Large back porch with laundry and freezer space all appliances included. Freshly painted with spotless carpets. Located on 1.3 heavily wooded acres naturally landscaped with great views all around. Out buildings include 10x12 shed, 40x40 fenced dog yard, and natural stone fire pit. Located just 44 miles south of the Grand Canyon. asking price 199,000.00, value 220,000.00 Contact seller at (928)-635-0342.

HOME FOR SALE
Enjoy natures beauty( and all the damn wildlife) from the comfort of your porch.
1920sq. feet, loved four bedroom, two full bath, including master suite with garden tub comfortably holds 3-5 dirty children or one very large dog. Charming fire place great for warming cold toes and cheeks on those snowy days, and roasting hot dogs and marshmallows when mommy gives in. Mommies pretty room(no touchie), comfortable family room, great for Family Friday sleep outs and game nights, never used formal dining room(can't trust those little mess makers) holds one piano and rocking chair perfectly. Large back porch, big enough to hold all sorts of crap and the washer and dryer. Large freezer included, ice cream and Popsicles optional, all appliances will be in working order including new microwave. Hand prints and permanent marker recently painted over, and carpet has been miraculously resurrected. Located on 1.3 acres full of trees, wild flowers, lizards and unknown bugs, previously mentioned very large dog also not included. out buildings include10x12 shed easy to fill with all of life's junk, 40x40 fully escapable dog yard, and natural stone fire pit perfect for little boys to perfect fire building skills. Located just off of highway 64, 44 miles south of the Grand Canyon. The other "Happiest Place on Earth". Asking price 199.000.00, value Priceless. Contact Family at (928)-635-0342.

The 3, 4 ,5 ,6 of July

Here in the great state of Arizona, firework are illegal, cities can choose to put on grand shows(ours chose not to this year as they burnt 10 acres last year) but us lowlifes are left with mere poppers and glow sticks. Which up to this year have been rather boring.
Well let me tell you after four days of puking, p%$ping, kids glow sticks are amazing, we popped a few and dropped them in the tub for Dawson to play with while mommy cleaned up his "bombs bursting in air", and used some for the "rockets red glare" in order to let other sick kids sleep(No lights please) and discovered if dropped in the bottom of the "Puke bucket" they make a great target for the older bunch.
So while the rest of you spent your weekend partying your patriotism away we did laundry, wiped tears and handed out pedialyte, and ginger ale, and watched the History channels "the Revolution" man we have it easy.

... and then we mourn

Wow, how do you say good-by to two super guys? Guys that you have flown with, joked with, camped with and saved lives with, you keep flying.

Sunday the worst happened two of our local medivac helicopters collided mid air, killing six and critically injuring one. The helicopter business is so small that you know practically everyone, especially those around you, and every time one is lost it is a personal loss. These pilots and flight crews are like a family they all made time to stop in the E.D. after Mikes accident, the word had gotten out and they rushed over to offer support, donate blood and just to keep an eye on "Binky" cause after all the E.D. is very understaffed.

They have given up their vacation time, holidays, and family time just to make sure that someone else lived, they have flown in weather that most sane people refuse to drive in to make sure a critical child received the medical help they needed, treated the drunk driver even after they had witnessed the carnage they left behind, and spent countless hours volunteering just because helicopters are just so cool.

So today every one went back to work fighting the fires, picking up and transporting the sick and broken, with shoulders a little lower, laughter a little bit quieter, and remember when stories a whole lot more frequent, and Tom Caldwell and Tom Clausing your buddies will miss you but you will never be forgotten. Fly safe.

Fire Season(its finally here)

Well for weeks Mike and all of his pyro buddies have been very sad that we have not had any fires yet, well we have plenty now (5 and counting). One helicopter has been in New Mexico on a huge fire, and we are watching a good friend fight those in Nor-Cal, and if you hear about a short-haul rescue in Zions that was Mike and his "bumble bee".

Mike was left at home to baby sit a prescribed burn on the North Rim and three days ago it got up and really went to town, still within its boundaries but moving faster then they wanted so we really haven't seen much of him. After talking with Mike and his fellow "flame bugs" they gave me some advice for you all.

1. don't drive into the smoke that's the way the fire is moving.

2. don't drive over just to look, the news crews will show you it at 10.

3. smile at the fire fighters when you see them(yes they know they are dirty and stink but they are trying to ensure your safety).

4. Smokey really knows what he is talking about.

5. and their favorite: if there is a fire camp set up close to you home baked goodies are always appreciated.(some of these guys are away from their families for months).

Going Green

Okay I have officially jumped on the "green bandwagon"(really it was more like a stumble and fall, kicking and screaming). I have now changed all light bulbs to energy friendly, recycle and compost, reuse the kids bath water, have limited showers to 3 minutes(because people if Africa only use 2 gallons on average daily, so we can't be water hogs), and know exactly how much water my family including pets use each week(1100 gallons), and we are trying to cut down a little more. My toothpaste is natural, we eat organic oreos, and ritz crackers, and thanks to Chet free range beef, and have even made my own weed killer with vinegar and dish soap(really works) but I just cannot and I mean cannot give up my shampoo and conditioner, I mean really how hard can it be to come up with a good organic that actually suds up like you want, or a conditioner that actually moves through your hair, don't get me wrong it smells really nice and has a great tingle, but I just need the suds.

15 months

Wow it is hard to believe it has been so long, but 15 months ago we finally got to bring Dawson home. I don't know if it as such a hard winter for us with Mikes accident or how sick Dawson was or if I am just nuts but I just can't shake the feeling that I am just waiting for the other shoe to fall. My wonderful Dr. calls it P.T.S.D. and recommended therapy so you all are it.

So here is Dawson's story I was admitted to FMC on February 27, 2007 for bed rest at 37 weeks due to high blood pressure and puppps. No luck in getting my numbers down so Wednesday morning they started the induction and Friday afternoon we had a baby, immediately we all knew something was wrong our beautiful little baby just laid there making the scariest noises, the N.I.C.U. team that was there immediately grabbed him put him in the warmer and started oxygen and he was rushed to the N.I.C.U. with severe respiratory distress.

After a few hours I was finally allowed to go down to see him, he looked so strange laying there prone under what looked just like a cake saver(oxygen hood) I don't know if I was scared or worried or just numb, after all it had been only two months before that, that they had let me into see Mike in the I.C.U. after surgery. It was so easy to believe them when they told us that they were just going to watch him for a little while( I now know that he was in transition) and that he would likely be fine and he would be moved up to my room sometime later that night.
That never happened, the very nice and sympathetic nurses put me in a room far away from the other new moms and crying babies(ours didn't cry for 5 days) and left me to settle in when I started to hemorrhage. My poor nurse was new to the floor and looked at me standing there with blood pooling at my feet gave me a towel and told me she needed to talk with the charge nurse, I never saw her again, so back comes the Dr. who asked if there was any other tricks me and mine would like to pull(her husband was one of Mikes surgeons) and calmly stood on my stomach and gave me a few tablets to stop the bleeding and no you don't take them orally. Everything was looking good so about 10'clock Mike left to go home to the kids who were with my mom, and I went to sleep.

You always hear about all the troubles with midnight, the witching hour and all of that, I now think it is true, I was awaken by that strange feeling you get when someone is watching you, to find my new nurse, the pediatrician, the N.I.C.U. Dr. and the hospital chaplain(yes they really do have them) standing next to my bed telling me that they had just intubated my baby and were placing central lines, and was I fine with that? and then they all just filed out and left me to go back to sleep, it was the weirdest feeling they all just acted like that was normal and that I shouldn't worry and I would be able to see him in the morning(I couldn't leave the bed due to my little bleeding problem). Well it wasn't a nightmare or even a bad dream because when I woke up I discovered the sad truth; my baby would never be coming up stairs, some mean nurse had came in while I slept and taken out the bassinet and even the pack of newborn diapers that had been sitting out for him.

Oh my baby was beautiful in a gloomy pale way. When I went down to see him they were still trying to get him stable, he was being treated for pulmonary hypertension, sepsis and possible pneumonia with unstable blood pressures of 48/33 and still didn't have a name. The N.I.C.U. staff was amazing the rushed me into a rocking chair and let me sit by his side all day long telling me everything the were doing to him laughing at his size and amazed at his will to fight(with babies this sick you don't get percentages you get live or die), and hounding us for a name. Our Bishop came that night and he and Mike gave him a blessing, and a name Dawson McKowen. Oh the nurses were so excited and quickly hung his name above him and informed us he looked just like a Dawson.

Sunday I awoke and finally cried and I mean sobbing on the end of the bed in a strange huddled heap with a very happy nurse holding on to me telling me that now that I had cried I could go home(my Dr. thinks she's a therapist), Home! I didn't want to go home my baby was here you idiot. But I had four little ones at home that needed their mommy too, and someone to pack their clothes for Disneyland(thanks G-ma Kelli and Brooke). So after a nice visit with our cutie I came home to see them off and to cuddle my new electric baby, aka; breast pump.

Monday Mike and I arrived to find that they now knew what was wrong with our baby and the appropriate drugs had been started. And that they now felt he would make it and get to come home in about 8-10 days. Dawson then proved to be a little shit as they weaned him from sedation he pulled his ventilator out set his apnea monitors off on a regular basis and wet through his diapers daily and was a very tough stick in the last few days he was there his I.V. was placed in his forehead. On day five he was taken off his ventilator and only on oxygen assistance with his cannula's hooked on by Velcro stuck on to his puppy dog cheeks.

Wow how time flew, Not. The N.I.C.U. for all their care is a very scary and somewhat boring place to spend your days. The one exciting very emotional event came on day 6 I finally got to hold my snugly new baby for an entire half hour. Unless you have been denied the feel of your new baby in your arms you will never understand it but it is better than anything else out there.

I spent most of my days sitting next to him in the good rocking chair(you know the nurses like you when they save you the good furniture)reading to him until it happened, the magic question "How would you like to take your baby home tomorrow?" Yee Haa I showed up the next morning ready to dress him for the first time, had passed the CPR class, arranged for oxygen to be brought into the house, had the car seat ready and then mommy gut feeling kicked in I just could not bring myself to take anything into the hospital, so I guess that I shouldn't have been so surprised and disappointed when the really, really, mean Dr. told me that he had failed his hearing test and they were going to keep him for at least 7 more days to treat him for meningitis and they would now be doing a lumbar puncture on him to culture. Then Mrs. well meaning nurse came to tell me that due to his deafness she would set up an appointment with the School for the Deaf in Phoenix, and me, I just sat there holding onto him reading his stories to him and quietly sobbing.

Another 7 days passed, Mikes mom came to help with the other kids, and I was now on a first name basis with at least half of the hospital, when again they told us we could take him home tomorrow, by this time Mike and I just looked at them like "yeah right we've been through this before", but no they said really you can have him home in the morning. So again we loaded up the "coming home outfit" new blankets, tiny little turquoise bear paw bracelet and his car seat and very cautiously walked into the N.I.C.U. only to be met by a nurse who claimed that she couldn't possibly part with him and could we please let her have him, well after a quick hell no we got to bath our precious baby for the first time dress him in his soft blue puppy dog sleeper safely buckle him into his car seat we practically ran out of there(I kept looking back for at least 3 miles) and took our baby home.

Now 15 months later he has passed two hearing tests(he has only a slight delay in his hearing possibly due to all the antibiotics), has us all convinced he is special, has learned to walk which he hates to do, and his favorite person to read to him is still his Mommy.

one of the few

Okay living away from Utah has brought us some great friends with some different beliefs(I have actually explained garments so well that many of my friends want them). So we were all so excited with this new game we found on www.beliefnet.com it even has a cheesy name "belief-o-matic"I and a few of my non member friends found out that they are really Mormon. So go try it.

oh so natural

So after yet another night of painting and scrubbing and looking for missing kittens we fell into bed(so it was only 9:30 you try raising five kids). Peace at last I stretched out in nice clean sheets, had perfect white noise from the window fan and was gone. Fast forward to 4:15 am clomp clomp, rattle rattle.... what the h#&% as I flew out of bed Mike so calmly replied just a cow!!!!!!!!! Sure enough my newly planted flowers went the way of free range and the worst part, I just shrugged and went back to sleep.

showing our age

Friday Mike and I started the dreaded pre painting, pre moving sorting, you know go through all your belongings get rid of half of it and repacking the rest(so you can get rid of that the next time) when I stumbled upon my childhood pride and joy my record collection. Yup you heard me a super sized stack of super sized vinyl. Wow what memories that brought back, me and Brooke, Saige, friends and cousins dancing and singing along with Annie, Ernie's Hits, and our all time favorite(tongue in cheek) I'm a Mormon! including the smash hit I want to be a Mother(yeah probably was my favorite). Mike being the great husband that he is even volunteered to go out to the shed and dig out my old record player for me. So there I am so excited to share the music from my childhood with my cute little group when Carsten spies my treasures "WOW mom look at the size of those disks did you have to carry your cd player on your back like a backpack, what kind of batteries did it take?" Well I told him to just be quiet and he was in for a great treat, So I played Ernie's hits for them turns out they have never seen Sesame Street so Ernie who, and some pretty good scratches, so it really did sound as if Ernie's rubber duckie had been exposed to a little to many bubbles, so we moved on to I Have a Song for You all about animals, volume 3. The only problem is that by then Kallison was dancing to Hannah Montana on her mp3, Braxton and Carsten had gone back to the wii and Ardynn just stood there looking at me like I had just told her she was going to have to start wearing Sam Jams(complete with hammer loop) and putting her hair in a side pony. At least Dawson thought it was cool he just stood there and shook his little osh kosh clad back side bopping out to Kitten in the Sun and Mister Stand-On-One-Leg, his mommy is so hip. By then even Mike had given into his unwarranted need to laugh at my lost childhood and safely retreated back to the shed and his own "lost boxes of childhood treasure." Well the records and there player are safely packed for the move, the kids are all back to the 21 century, Mike is still out in the shed laughing at me, and as for me when did I get old?

just thinking

Okay so we are now on day four of summer break, and currently my darlings are chasing each other around the house shooting bubbles at each other. Dawson is not even been dressed today, there is a big, okay huge orange cat on my lap, and the house is starting to look like the circus came by and forgot to take the animals back. The best part is we are all totally happy(maybe not the cat he is now digging his claws into my leg). So with that start I am going to tell you all a few of the little things that make me happy.
1. Five(5) crazy HEALTHY half dressed kids.
2. A great husband who flies his tail off so I can enjoy the above mentioned kids and cats and dogs, and yes even the goldfish.
3. Strange but true a wonderful Grandmother who keeps me full of free samples, no kidding last month she gave me a year supply of my favorite deodorant.
4. A great book.
5. CHOCOLATE
6.All of my great friends.
7. New beads!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
8. The for sell sign ready to go out in front om my house.
9. Mikes limp that I now only notice when he is tired.
10. The above limper whose awesome dedication to physical therapy has left only a slight limp.
11. The family of his donor who gave of their loved one, so Mikes leg could be rebuilt.
12. did I mention new beads.
13. Cute new toe rings for summer
14. My new BBQ grill.
15. Snow in May.

SAY WHAT

Okay so today I was speechless(something that rarely happens) my very cute, very observant nine year old came up to me with a very interesting question "Mom whats reptile dysfunction?" Umm... hello does anyone want to help, it was only a few months ago he questioned us about where Viagra Falls was. Now my kids are pretty smart they know all the "correct" names for body parts(and some pretty strange ones too), but I am so not ready for these talks. Really is there any way to keep them small? By the way reptile dysfunction is when your "lizard" just can't get up and go anymore.

Spring pictures

Here are the latest pictures of the "School Kids" they are all out of school and making big plans for summer. Carsten is playing Baseball and all will be taking swim lessons. we will also be traveling to Utah for the get together at "The Compound" in July.

her first graduation

Last Tuesday Ardynn graduated from kindergarten, she is now an official first grader. Friday was our last day of school not only for the year but also our last day at Williams Elementary School, next school year if we are still living here the kids will be attending Liberty Tradional Charter School.

Oh how the mighty have fallen

Just for the record I am a very smug person, I always inwardly smile when ever some incapable person says "wow you have five kids, how do you do it?" So it is with great humility that I tell this horrible tale. Our weather has been awful: cold, wet, windy, even snowy so super mom that I am let my little darlings loose with all the extra birthday treats from the girls birthday parties.
We are talking bubbles, stickers, make-up even feather boas( the boys use these to tease the cats) and remember those fun little grow a sponges tons of those. I was thinking wow everyone played so cute, and the boys helped the girls hatch their fun little sponges, maybe we should do this more often, so pat pat on the back until alas two days later when I changed the babies bottom it was the worst dirty diaper ever my darling one year old the apple of my eye had s#*&
out a 747 bright yellow jumbo jet , apparently he had swallowed a small harmless sponge capsule, that had traveled through his little digestive tract that had dissolved leaving only a jumbo jet and a very clean one year old.